Daily Telegraph April Fool Story - Eurofighter Typhoon

Did anyone else read the article in Saturday's edition of the Daily Telegraph? It was on Page 11 and was entitled "Why fighter pilots wear a Typhoon Grin".

Written by Thomas Harding, the Telegraph's Defence Correspondent, it was supposed to be an examination of the strengths of the RAF's "new" fighter. However, it was filled with so many mistakes, inaccuracies and downright lies that I can only conclude that Mr Harding was paid by the MOD to write a propaganda piece, or it was an April Fool's joke.

To say that the RAF's new fighter accelerates faster than a formula one car is to sell it very short indeed.

For the first 700ft of take-off, the comparison seems apt, but then

40,000lbs of rear thrust put the aircraft into a vertical ascent that feels like being in the Space Shuttle and we soar from Earth to 12,000ft in four seconds flat.

Four seconds? Really?

A quick calculation shows that feat requires a speed of 2045 mph - Mach 2.6 at sea level. Considering that the Typhoon is restricted to Mach 1.3 at sea level, I'm a little puzzled as to how they can do this. Let's also consider the acceleration. The jet would have to be doing that Mach 2.6 as soon as its wheels left the deck. To accelerate to that speed in 700ft would require an acceleration of 1959g. Does anyone really believe the airframe is stressed to such limits? And that is one *incredible* G-suit that the aircrew are wearing!

"I think it's a fabulous airplane, something we can be hugely proud of as a nation," said Wg Cdr Bennett.

So, no mention of the fact that over 60% of the airframe was designed and built in Germany, Italy and Spain?

The criticisms that the Typhoon is outdated even before it enters service will disappear as it is adapted to become a multi-role aircraft.

It will be able to carry heavy bomb loads of two 2,000lb smart bombs, Stormshadow cruise missiles, Brimstone anti-tank weapons, reconnaissance equipment and an array of air-to-air missiles.

The heavy payload will not affect performance, pilots say, and its ground attack capability will come into effect at the end of this decade.

"The heavy payload will not affect performance"? I believe that they are

*lying*. Strap 4000 pounds of anything underneath the jet and it will all of a sudden become a bit more sluggish. Add to that the fact that it will be g-limited whilst it is carrying stores, and your "fabulous airplane" all of a sudden looks just like all the rest of 'em.

"Its ground attack capability will come into effect at the end of this decade". Translation: "Not yet cleared to carry heavy external stores. We're keeping our fingers crossed."

We drop down for a low-level pass over RAF Leeming before screaming along the Hawes Valley in North Yorkshire, telling traffic control we will become invisible to radar.

"Invisible to radar"? Typhoon is *not* a stealth aircraft. What they really mean is that the air traffic computer software was not designed to track something moving that fast and that the pilot is therefore a complete cowboy for behaving in such a manner.

Let's look at the truth of the matter. Typhoon has been delayed for six years and is massively over budget. It is plagued with problems, so much so that the Operational Conversion Unit had to be based at BAe Warton, the manufacturer's facility where they are built. Groundcrew who have been on conversion courses for it are dreading its service introduction as it requires more maintenance man-hours per flying hour than Jaguar! And this "fighter" doesn't even have an internal gun. The RAF, in its infinite wisdom, has decided to save money by not using or maintaining the gun. So... not learning 35 year-old lessons, eh?

So what do you reckon. Propaganda or April Fool's joke?

Reply to
Enzo Matrix
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somebody be flunkin' that there math test.

Reply to
e

[snipped]

Damn! And there was me thinking that there was going to be a spoof story on a composited picture of the WWII Typhoon with a jet intake instead of the spinner.

Richard.

Reply to
Richard Brooks

They could use that gaping hole under the spinner. :)

Bill Banaszak, MFE Sr.

Reply to
Mad-Modeller

Or....using a paint package do a 'lend lease' story based on this;

The beauty of this story is that people will think that the nausea part would be a joke. :-)

Richard.

Reply to
Richard Brooks

Probably. As I recall it was caused by the supersonic speeds of the prop tips. About a year ago I helped somebody with the few pics I have of the beastie. I hope he got his model built. Painted in grey and green over NMF with rwb roundels, it would look smashing sitting next to an F-111K. ;)

Bill Banaszak, MFE Sr.

Reply to
Mad-Modeller

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