Keith Olbermann: "Where's My Optimus Prime?"

The following is part of a transcript from the cable news program
"Countdown with Keith Olbermann". It was originally broadcasted
December 13, 2005. MSNBC has allowed me to post this piece of
transcript which makes a very good point about America Robotics
OLBERMANN: You know what? I was saying to the staff the other day as
we convened for our annual retreat inside the phone booth out on the
corner out there. You know what we don't have enough of on this
show? Robots. We don't get but what? Three, five, 27 robot stories
a week. So our No. 1 story on the COUNTDOWN tonight, more robots.
The Samurai robot has been unveiled at the very same Shito Shrine in
Japan where, for centuries, inventors and investors have come together
to offer prayers before taking their offerings to the masses. The
company has no plans to actually sell this thing. But, it hopes to
make enough improvements to make it marketable eventually as a security
or caretaker robot.
And then there's this little guy. You may remember his trumpet
playing predecessor, Honda's latest version of the Asimo robot can
run at twice the original speed, a swift 3.7-miles-per-hour. Still
looks like a guy who is really rushing to get to the bathroom,
doesn't he? He has an additional 14 joints. He's able to serve
coffee. A little more cargo room and it'll be bigger than the
original Honda Civic sedan of 1992.
Add the Samurai robot to the exoskeleton robot made by Toyota, which
sort of sits on top of you and you can go up to 25-miles-per-hour in it
and you can just concentrate on making that cell phone call instead of
distracting your energy into things like, oh, paying attention to where
you are going!
So, we're getting there, towards that promise they used to put in
public service announcements of 40 years ago encouraging to you
exercise, because if we didn't exercise, we'd all wind up some day
as just disembodied heads with robots moving us from place to place.
Like that would be a bad thing. So, we're getting there. Robots to
clean, to cook, to fill in for me so I can take a night off every once
in a while. Robots to stand in for me the next time I have to battle a
OLBERMANN (voice-over): The futures, what wonders will it bring?
Well, it certainly is a mystery, but one thing is for sure, the future
will be filled with robots. Robots will do anything humans could do
only better. Need some help with the housework, mom? Dad not around
to chip in? Relax, take a load off, get your hair done. How about a
robotini? In the future, you'll never do chores again.
Our scientists of today are busy building the world of tomorrow where
menial tasks and dangerous duties are done for you leaving you free to
relax and enjoy the finer things all thanks to the magic of the robot.
OLBERMANN: Hmm, hasn't really turned out that way, has it? Sure
there's a robot to detonate bombs here and there, maybe explore some
distant planet, like I needed that. Where's my robot? I saw the
"Jetsons." I should have a robot maid, a robot car, a robot golf
ROSIE, ROBOT: Come and get it.
OLBERMANN: "Star Wars" is loaded with robots.
Sure the robots could be annoying, but they follow orders, they help
fight to save the galaxy, and that was a long time ago. It says right
there, "long time ago." It's 2005 over here. What do I have?
And don't tell me "Roomba." I'm not saying it's lack of
effort on the part of scientists these days, but how hard are they
really trying to get me my robot?
We've a handful of robots that do some cool stuff like they can fight
each other, but who's cleaning my kitchen? I am. Well I am paying
somebody else to clean my kitchen, but you know what I mean. There
should be a robot for all of that and all I see are these robo jokes.
An arm wrestling robot! What's that good for? Robot mice! We don't
have enough real mice? A walking robot that can't walk straight.
Have another drink, Remi. Where's my robot car? Where's my
Optimums Prime (ph)? The only ones even halfway serious about making
robots are the Japanese. Our robots, they waddle around on a table
Asimo over there is at least playing the trumpet. Another one plays
the trumpet on wheels. Sure, rub it in, guys! Have one conduct the
whole orchestra, why don't you? They've even got flying Mr. Soccer
Ball robot. At least they are trying! We are over here messing around
with Clocky while they're getting robot massages, watching robodogs
play robo soccer. It is embarrassing to us as a nation. If we aspire
to be truly lazy as Americans, then we need to get off our butts and
build some better robots! And then get back down on our butts and say,
Coolio, bring me a beer!
It's probably worth taking another look at Asimo who does look like
he, either he is late for the men's room or perhaps he was raised in
a house with very low ceilings. And this is the way he's learned to
run. The future of robotic science, Asimo joins our COUNTDOWN robot
hall of fame.
As Dr. Zachary Smith used to say in "Lost in Space," "You
monstrous metallurgical meddler, you terrified mechanical dunderhead!
Oh the pain. The shame."
That's COUNTDOWN, I'm Keith Olbermann. Keep your knees loose.
Goodnight and good luck.
Reply to
Bushido Hacks
Loading thread data ...
Good point...
Interesting that any technology developed in our country is used in military operations...
build a better gun, they want to hire you or steal your plans.
build a robot to shoot the gun, same thing...
Japan seems to have many hobbyist's building humanoid (2 arms, 2 legs, walking) robots..
If this were in the US, these people would immediately be hired to develop military humanoid robots....
I don't think it's any different in Japan.
This has been going on for years (development of these robots)... They've made some major progress according to information available on the internet. What are they not showing us?
I wonder how many cargo ships, submarines, jets, or other transportation vehicles are loaded with armies of humanoid robots, ready to defend or attack?
Reply to
Do you have a link for this ? I couldn't find it even after several minutes looking on CNBC and Google.
Reply to
formatting link
Reply to
Heyyyyyyy ! That's MY website ! :-)
Reply to
That is what you asked for, is't it !
Reply to
Actually I was hoping to find more info on the robot content mentioned regarding the 'Keith Olbermann: "Where's My Optimus Prime"' transcript. Got any good info on that ?
Reply to

PolyTech Forum website is not affiliated with any of the manufacturers or service providers discussed here. All logos and trade names are the property of their respective owners.