Keith Olbermann: "Where's My Optimus Prime?"

The following is part of a transcript from the cable news program "Countdown with Keith Olbermann". It was originally broadcasted December 13, 2005. MSNBC has allowed me to post this piece of transcript which makes a very good point about America Robotics Research.

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OLBERMANN: You know what? I was saying to the staff the other day as we convened for our annual retreat inside the phone booth out on the corner out there. You know what we don't have enough of on this show? Robots. We don't get but what? Three, five, 27 robot stories a week. So our No. 1 story on the COUNTDOWN tonight, more robots.

The Samurai robot has been unveiled at the very same Shito Shrine in Japan where, for centuries, inventors and investors have come together to offer prayers before taking their offerings to the masses. The company has no plans to actually sell this thing. But, it hopes to make enough improvements to make it marketable eventually as a security or caretaker robot.

And then there's this little guy. You may remember his trumpet playing predecessor, Honda's latest version of the Asimo robot can run at twice the original speed, a swift 3.7-miles-per-hour. Still looks like a guy who is really rushing to get to the bathroom, doesn't he? He has an additional 14 joints. He's able to serve coffee. A little more cargo room and it'll be bigger than the original Honda Civic sedan of 1992.

Add the Samurai robot to the exoskeleton robot made by Toyota, which sort of sits on top of you and you can go up to 25-miles-per-hour in it and you can just concentrate on making that cell phone call instead of distracting your energy into things like, oh, paying attention to where you are going!

So, we're getting there, towards that promise they used to put in public service announcements of 40 years ago encouraging to you exercise, because if we didn't exercise, we'd all wind up some day as just disembodied heads with robots moving us from place to place. Like that would be a bad thing. So, we're getting there. Robots to clean, to cook, to fill in for me so I can take a night off every once in a while. Robots to stand in for me the next time I have to battle a Samurai.

(BEGIN VIDEOTAPE)

OLBERMANN (voice-over): The futures, what wonders will it bring? Well, it certainly is a mystery, but one thing is for sure, the future will be filled with robots. Robots will do anything humans could do only better. Need some help with the housework, mom? Dad not around to chip in? Relax, take a load off, get your hair done. How about a robotini? In the future, you'll never do chores again.

Our scientists of today are busy building the world of tomorrow where menial tasks and dangerous duties are done for you leaving you free to relax and enjoy the finer things all thanks to the magic of the robot.

(END VIDEOTAPE)

OLBERMANN: Hmm, hasn't really turned out that way, has it? Sure there's a robot to detonate bombs here and there, maybe explore some distant planet, like I needed that. Where's my robot? I saw the "Jetsons." I should have a robot maid, a robot car, a robot golf caddie.

ROSIE, ROBOT: Come and get it.

OLBERMANN: "Star Wars" is loaded with robots.

Sure the robots could be annoying, but they follow orders, they help fight to save the galaxy, and that was a long time ago. It says right there, "long time ago." It's 2005 over here. What do I have? And don't tell me "Roomba." I'm not saying it's lack of effort on the part of scientists these days, but how hard are they really trying to get me my robot?

We've a handful of robots that do some cool stuff like they can fight each other, but who's cleaning my kitchen? I am. Well I am paying somebody else to clean my kitchen, but you know what I mean. There should be a robot for all of that and all I see are these robo jokes. An arm wrestling robot! What's that good for? Robot mice! We don't have enough real mice? A walking robot that can't walk straight. Have another drink, Remi. Where's my robot car? Where's my Optimums Prime (ph)? The only ones even halfway serious about making robots are the Japanese. Our robots, they waddle around on a table top.

Asimo over there is at least playing the trumpet. Another one plays the trumpet on wheels. Sure, rub it in, guys! Have one conduct the whole orchestra, why don't you? They've even got flying Mr. Soccer Ball robot. At least they are trying! We are over here messing around with Clocky while they're getting robot massages, watching robodogs play robo soccer. It is embarrassing to us as a nation. If we aspire to be truly lazy as Americans, then we need to get off our butts and build some better robots! And then get back down on our butts and say, Coolio, bring me a beer!

It's probably worth taking another look at Asimo who does look like he, either he is late for the men's room or perhaps he was raised in a house with very low ceilings. And this is the way he's learned to run. The future of robotic science, Asimo joins our COUNTDOWN robot hall of fame.

As Dr. Zachary Smith used to say in "Lost in Space," "You monstrous metallurgical meddler, you terrified mechanical dunderhead! Oh the pain. The shame."

That's COUNTDOWN, I'm Keith Olbermann. Keep your knees loose.

Goodnight and good luck.

Reply to
Bushido Hacks
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Good point...

Interesting that any technology developed in our country is used in military operations...

build a better gun, they want to hire you or steal your plans.

build a robot to shoot the gun, same thing...

Japan seems to have many hobbyist's building humanoid (2 arms, 2 legs, walking) robots..

If this were in the US, these people would immediately be hired to develop military humanoid robots....

I don't think it's any different in Japan.

This has been going on for years (development of these robots)... They've made some major progress according to information available on the internet. What are they not showing us?

I wonder how many cargo ships, submarines, jets, or other transportation vehicles are loaded with armies of humanoid robots, ready to defend or attack?

Reply to
jboothbee

Do you have a link for this ? I couldn't find it even after several minutes looking on CNBC and Google.

Reply to
pogo

Sure:

formatting link

Reply to
Donald

Reply to
pogo

That is what you asked for, is't it !

Reply to
Donald

Actually I was hoping to find more info on the robot content mentioned regarding the 'Keith Olbermann: "Where's My Optimus Prime"' transcript. Got any good info on that ?

Reply to
pogo

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