Is it just me or do other folks lie to their partners when questioned about how much their latest purchase(s) costed. I managed to pursuade my wife that my new Futaba FF6 TX only cost GBP 50. Felt a bit guilty about though.
Not lying, just bending reality to fit into her world....
This is bending reality, could maybe be stretched to be a white one....
What about keeping her on a strict need-to-know basis? Also, vague answers will do: "it only cost a few bucks/pounds or what ever currency", the term "a few" range from three to houndreds/thousands if you ask me!!
You don't have to tell her in details what you buy, if you crash your .40 size trainer, just tell her you are replacing it with a new plane. Dont tell her that you actually are buying a .60 plane complete with new servos and a brand new .91 4-stroke engine....
If she's confronting you with unpleasant account statements or other evidence, just start comparing your cost to her monster-shopping tours togheter with her mom and sister, then she will stop bothering you.
Regards, Erik
No. My wife is my partner and deserves to know how much money is being spent. She is also very supportive of my hobby, and often helps me purchase things I need. Dr.1 Driver "There's a Hun in the sun!"
The answer is truly simple, but requires self discipline.
Step 1.) Start by making a written household budget, if you don't already have one. Mine only has 8 categories, such as Household, Food, Optional & Entertainment (restaurants are entertainment, not food! ), Auto, Utilities etc... Too many categories make it too hard to work. Things like insurance can easily be placed under Auto, Medical, or Household, you get the picture! Stick to it! It may take a few months before you really get the idea of what needs to be where, and it really works. Make a new monthly budget before the start of each month, starting with the income you're guaranteed to bring home that month. INCLUDE HER IN THE PROCESS! Spend or save every dollar on paper before the month begins. Both of you should know where all of your money goes every month. If one category goes over, you have to move some money from somewhere else.
Step 2.) Our family budget includes "spending money" that is credited to each of us weekly. Didn't spend it? It builds up. Clothing is included in our spending money. Her's is a slightly larger amount, as her clothing is more expensive than mine, and she needs to look decent at work.
The numbers should be reasonable to your individual budget. Not being honest with yourselves will guarantee it won't work. Balsa wood is never a "home repair" expense. This way, if I want to drop $500 on a toy, it's MY $500 to drop. If she wants to spend $800 on a yoga retreat, she can! Not enough spending money available? We don't buy it! I sell unused "toys" on eBay and recycle my spending money.
I track things with "fake" accounts in Quicken, a paper notebook or spreadsheet would also fit the bill.
Most couples I know that fight about money usually miss the true cause of the argument. One or both of them is often spending money the household really doesn't have. The written budget will help you tell your money what YOU want it to do, rather than the other way around. Over 16 years, we've NEVER fought about money, I've NEVER lied about a purchase, and we've never blown our budget. We enjoy our "silly" purchases more than you imagine!
Anyone who is intelligent enough to build and fly r/c can do this, if they put the effort into it.
Barry
This lunchtime I bought some black insulating tape.... Used primarily for my new Heli. But If I use some of this for household purposes, does it go in the household budget???
Hey, I handle the money in my house!! Well, when she lets me...Actually I really do handle the money, and my almost perfect wife never asks how much things cost.(pertaining to flying) She has money for what she wants and that's enough for her. Eddie Fulmer
PS She's not for sale or trade either so don't ask!!!!! I don't have time to train another one.
You might be fooling yourself. Ask yourself when was the last time your WIFE came running to YOU to show you all the clothes (or other stuff) SHE bought? This is a two way street. Personally, I notice that new stuff shows up in the house all the time that I didn't know about, and I'm sure my wife notices new stuff in the garage. We have a really good policy with each other called "Don't ask, don't tell". It must be working because we've been married over 30 years :-)
MJC
I have a skysport4 TX, and 2 OS 15's for sale.... will that do??? Ok maybe not the wife, but training instructions. I know what you mean. As long as she can buy new cloths when she want's she is happy. We have a private joke going here. She will ask me how much I spent and I reply '5 pounds'. Now everything I buy costs '5 pounds'.
She probably knows you're lying. It'll come home to roost someday.
CR
freeda wrote:
Never, but NEVER, lie to the wife!
But, it's completely permissible to answer in a unit of currency she doesn't understand (here in the U.S., I use pounds).
It works with her weight, too. If she says "do I look fat in this", I say something like, "oh, no - nine or ten stone at most"...
Dan.
Barry, We get pretty specific about our budgets, and do a complete financial analysis of the preceding years expenditures every year. Easy to see trends, easy to plan for the future, easy to tell the truth. We have been at it longer than you.
Figuring out which account to charge the specific expense to is a joint issue. Tape is a general consumable, so the house buys SOME of it. There are some high dollar things I wanted for my hobby but justified because there were other 'accounts' where the item was going to be useful. My multi purpose special built utility/airplane trailer is a good example of how to spend over $1,000 and have the house pay for it.
Funny. I have a friend that was learning to fly heli's. His system was to crash, stop at the store on the way home and buy another one. Then get up in the middle of the night and build the new one. Did that 3 times and the wife never knew, thought it was the same heli and he never crashed it. We still laugh and she still don't know :)
Do you tell you wife/partner what YOU think the cost of the part should be? Do you think the cost of component parts are too expensive. This I think is the real reason why we lie, we all think that we have been ripped off at least once
Right on.
The point is that you talk about these things often, so there's no hard feelings, no sneaking around...
You know exactly what I'm talking about.
Barry
Hell, you guys are making WAY too much money if you can make budgets! ;^) I have one simple budget: whatever comes in, she gets.
My toy budget comes from my small business.
Why we tend to lie...well, uh, not me, YOU fellas...is because much of the stuff we buy is a lot more expensive than it looks to the average female eye. Take a receiver. A small plastic box with a tiny wire sticking out of it. Looks like pocket change to my wife. If she knew they average $60-$100, well, that would be bad, because then she would start going around my garage counting receivers. That's unnacceptable, because then she'll want to know that those servos, which to her look like 50 cents, cost a piece. No, that just cannot happen. I once found out what a pair of one of her shoes cost, then I glanced in the closet. I don't want to go there anymore.
a wife ??? wath 's that, is it something new at towers ????
It rythmes with knife. Both have their uses, but both are DANGEROUS as well.
Its only you. I would never sneak a new kit into the garage under cover of darkness or have an Ebay item shipped over to my father's house. I wouldnt even THINK of such a thing.
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