On Fri, 24 Apr 2009 22:33:06 -0700, the infamous Mark & Juanita scrawled the following:
You're _kidding_, right? Just last week a criminal was apprehended by a cop who shouted "Marco" as he searched for the guy who was hiding in a warehouse. The perp answered "Polo."
Google "Darwin Awards" for the real doozies, Mark.
This landed in my email box this morning, but I shan't reply:
--snip-- FROM THE DESkTOP OF MR SANDERS WEEK INTERCONTINENTAL BANK NIG. PLC.
ATTENTION:
I seek for your co-operation; my name is Mr.Sanders Week A Personal Accountant to Late Engineer Michael, a citizen of your country , who used to work with French oil major total, company here in. Herein, shall be referred to as my client. On the 21st of April 2004, Mr. Michael, his wife and his three children were involved in a drastic car accident along Sagamu/Lagos Express Road. Unfortunately he and his three kids lost their lives immediately in the event of the accident, while the wife was taken to the hospital where she died three days later. Their bodies were kept in the mortuary for five months, in order for the authority, to carry out a proper investigation on how to locate their surviving relatives. They have checked all available public files and embassies, but all their efforts had proved abortive, as they could not fund any of their relatives.
After these several unsuccessful attempts, no one has been coming for his account that he deposited with my bank (Intercontinental Bank Nigeria Plc). And due to the banking law and regulation of 1985, sub section 18d page 103 chapter 11 of constitution governing all banking policy, and in accordance to the banking decree 003 sub section 45 which stated that any deposited fund which remains unclaimed after the existing period of four years will be confiscated by the national treasury department as unclaimed fund. And this has brought too much agitation in our bank between boards of directors on how to declare this account unserviceable, base on the fact that the deceased has no next of kin. After the meeting held by the executives of intercontinental bank with the personal attorney to late Michael on
15th of August 2008, they have all agreed to extend the date to 7th of April 2009.Consequently to this, I have contacted you to assist in repatriating the money and property left behind by my client before the national treasury department gets them confiscated or declare unserviceable by intercontinental bank Plc Where the deceased have an account Valued at about fifteen Million, three hundred and forty five thousand U.S dollars (USD 15, 345,000.00). The bank has issued out a notice to provide the next of kin or have the account confiscated with in the next few days. Since no one has been able to locate their relatives for over four years now, I seek your consent to present you as the next of kin of the deceased so that this account valued at fifteen Million, three hundred and forty five thousand U.S dollars (USD 15,
345,000.00) can be paid to you and then you and I Can share the money. All the necessary documents concerning this claim are with the Bank legal department. All I require is your honest cooperation to enable us seeing this deal through. I gua! rantee that this will be executed under a legal arrangement and procedure that will protect you and I from any breach of the law.Get back to me for immediate commencement of this deal.
Yours Truly Mr.Sanders Week
--snip--
And the folks from the Global Stimulus Package sent me a check for $830,375 yesterday.
P.S: Long time no see! How's the Wreck these days?