What a gloomy lot you are this evening! I'm cheerful as I've spent a most interesting evening with my son & his pregnant partner, full of chat and technical stuff, family, one of Hazel's excellent casseroles, wine & good humour. So I'm pretty upbeat ATM ;o))
I understand the Old Sod is actively seeking a different venue & a well placed, well drained field would do, surely? I arrange outdoor events & filmwork all the time & it really isn't rocket science. It should have two gates and not be directly off the main road. A slight slope is good, car park at the bottom between the gates, stalls etc further up the slope - go up empty handed, easy roll down to the car. Some Portaloos & food outlets and Robert is your mother's brother.
Which more or less describes Newbury ..............