I'd get a paintball gun. On full auto you could spray a burst well in front of him to get him scurrying away from you to avoid putting out an eye and then once he turns tail nail him in the hind quarters to your hearts content.
Steve P.
Something I learned a long while back--an acorn shot from a slingshot stings like hell, makes a racket if it hits something amenable to racket-making, but it won't usually break a window if it hits one (at least the ones where I lived wouldn't).
If you're careful with your selection they also can have remarkably uniform ballistics.
Have you ever tried starting fluid? I've used it when I was out of wasp spray and it drops wasps even faster. Of course you can't use it if the dog is smoking. ;-)
If he's on smoke break he won't be botherin' those cats ;)
But I guess nothing would get that neighbor's attention like seeing his dog come running home with his ass on fire!
FWIW, I nailed one with Magnamax and the HVLP sprayer today.
Turpintining his ass will do that without even lighting it. He will try to break the world's land speed record oon four feet, though.
I took out a very large bee with some gelled paint stripper in a spray can lid once. It's a good thing it was a direct hit when I threw the gell at the bee. That type doesn't lose it's stinger, and are very aggressive.
Hit the intruder with the hornet spray, drag him to a linoleum floor THEN shoot him a few times! (Just kidding---sponsor the guy in a rehabilitation program then get him a job and move him into your house until he's on his feet.)
You almost have it - you hit the intruder, drag him into the kitchen and put hornet attractant on his body. Open the door.
Then try to remember how to dial 9-1-1...
Mart>> >>
I have been reading this thread for some time, and note that there are a lot of good suggestions. But I am somewhat surprised that no one has yet suggested a paintball gun to discourage the dog. It is not lethal (when used correctly), will sting and leave a temporary mark to show that the dog was where it was not supposed to be.
Scroll back a few posts and you will see that it was mentioned. I agree, and I'm surprised it wasn't suggested earlier in the thread.
And if you use a red paintball it will scare the crap out of the owner of the dog until they find out that the dog is covered in paint, not blood.
Many pet owners consider their pets as family members, and if one's family member were to trot in with a humiliating splash of paint, a certain rage against the marksman would ensue. I dislike pets and especially their wandering fecula deliveries, but I do value comity with my neighbors. Once offened, a neighbor tends to remain a permanent enemy. So if one were to attempt this dubious strategy of launching missiles against the intruders, discretion would be indicated, and paintballs are the very opposite of discretion.
Not to mention making a mess of your own landscape.
Which is why Airsoft was invented. 400 FPS will do a number on vinyl siding, though:-)
Ya never know, Dr. Kinch. Karl knows his neighbor and friend. A good neighbor and long-time friend might even see humor in his marauding dog coming home redassed, soreassed and possibly chastened after being caught molesting Julie's kittens. The dog isn't injured so no harm done. Kids and dogs, ya know.
Branding its marauding arse with a paintball purely beats dropping it DRT with a .223 in terms of preserving comity with a neighbor and friend. Good friends and neighbors in MN know that comity cuts both ways.
Well, if they're such good friends and neighbors, why doesn't he just say, "Could you please keep your dog from eating my wife's pussy?"
EWWWW - sorry - That just popped into my head in the middle of that sentence, and I don't know what came over me, I just couldn't restrain myself. =:-O
Sorry. Rich
A completely true statement: the class is about teaching you to train your dog. You do the training every day between classes (my dog is currently looking reproachfully at me, since she's gotten so little time lately...).
Puppy completely failed obedience class, however, on the record of attendance, at 4 months of age, she and all the other puppies got a certificate, bag of cookies and pamphlet of other trick like shake a paw. My reaction was "Lacey, shake a paw" and up came the right paw. Brought the house down. Now, when in doubt, up comes the paw, but don't grasp, just shake. Gerry :-)} London, Canada
My youngest daughter is a natural. We had a couple of abysmally stupid miniature dachshunds that the kids loved and I secretly regarded as musky bait. There was a neighborhood "obedience contest" where kids would bring their pets and show how they'd trained them.
Karen, about 5 at the time, done broke the code. She just watched the dog to see what it'd do and then immediately commanded it to do it in a surprisingly stentorian tone for such a tiny person.
When she sternly commanded "Ginger, PEE", the judges lost it. She got a blue ribbon.
True story.
Maybe from May thru October. May is apple blossom time at Karl's farm.
Had a job applicant/interview candidate arrive from Texas at MSP in January years ago. I met him at the airport. Evening arrival, don't recall what the temp was other than unremarkably well below zero. When we went out the door to exit the terminal he gasped, involuntarily uttered an expression of surprise that'd blister the paint off a hockey rink, went back into the terminal and booked the next flight outta here.
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