I am posting from Heavens

Unexpectedly, a powerful force picked me up yesterday. I and a few of
my earthly possessions, such as my Bridgeport Interact mill, were
transported to the heavens. I am now surrounded by angels and
virgins. Not sure who to start with first, virgins or Bridgeport
wiring.
Where are the electric outlets here? And how do I do grounding in heavens?
I urgently need your donations, paypal address provided upon request.
Reply to
Ignoramus17643
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Phwew! Jeez, it's hot down here. It's a good thing I was ready with my Nomex fire suit.
Hey, it's not as bad as I thought. I walked through the door and they handed me a Martini and a beautiful girl. But the hell of it is that the Martini glass has a hole in the bottom, but the girl....
Reply to
Ed Huntress
The big question is "Was your wife transported with you?", eh? Will you be milling or drilling the virgins, sir? If the latter, you'll want to do it manually, I'd think.
Yeah, where the HELL are you going to find an electrician in Heaven?
Oh, post it, sir and be deluged!
-- The only reason we die, is because we accept death as an inevitability. -- Seth MacFarlane
Reply to
Larry Jaques
What I can't figure out is how someone can set a date based on believing the Bible says something it doesn't say, but not believe the part that plainly says "no man knows the day or hour".
RogerN
Reply to
RogerN
I would not say exactly "manually".
Yep, good point.
I have an appointment with God the day after tomorrow, and I was told that I can recommend up to three good people. That's a little hint as to why you need to send those donations!
i
Reply to
Ignoramus17643
I would say, good question. Lots of suckers were made to look bad yesterday.
i
Reply to
Ignoramus17643
Is that the the *only* contradiction/ anomaly you can't figure out about the bible?
Wow.
You can't have read very much of it, then.
-- Jeff R. What *I* can't figure out is how anyone can believe that any of it is "divine".
Reply to
Jeff R.
He addresses that question on his website. What he says is baloney, of course, but he does talk about that.
The more interesting thing from my viewpoint is that he imagines that he found the numbers he bases his calculation on in the Bible. IMHO, there's some *serious* psychopathology involved there...
Reply to
Doug Miller
Orally, then? I didn't know you had Franch blood.
Lawyers and politicians are equally sparse up there, I hear.
God'd like that. He apparently allows bribery or relidjus folks in L.A. couldn't have spent that $465M on a single church. I understand he has an equally loose morals code. Ask any Catholic priest, eh?
-- The only reason we die, is because we accept death as an inevitability. -- Seth MacFarlane
Reply to
Larry Jaques
But more on the part of his followers. He, after all, has built a $42 million empire by feeding them that stuff. d8-)
Reply to
Ed Huntress
Well, if I understand the history of your various Bridgeport projects, the Bridgeport wiring is quite unlike the virgins in that it is well and truly -- well, never mind.
I hope you like it up there. I think that someone out in cyberspace should collect all the missing persons reports for the 21st and 22nd and make a poster with the headline "That's IT?!?"
(Best quote in the post-non-apocalypse: "well, I guess we miscalculated this one, better go hit the Book again and figure things out").
Reply to
Tim Wescott
Automatically ?
Reply to
john B.
"Manually" means "by using hands".
i
Reply to
Ignoramus17643
It's more like, 'One more false prophet bites the dust'
Reply to
Michael A. Terrell
Larry be very careful, there are some of those that aren't reluctant to use, shall we say, very forceful and permanent "rebukes" to statements like that. :-) (murdering Drs. that have different ethics) :-) ...lew...
Reply to
Lewis Hartswick
Judging from some of the lightning I saw yesterday, I don't think they DO grounding up there!
Jon
Reply to
Jon Elson
Actually it was me welding up there.
i
Reply to
Ignoramus1594
Switching from TIG to CD welding? Was the Joplin incident you dropping the hose to your shop vac?
Reply to
Pete C.
That was a Heaven vac.
i
Reply to
Ignoramus1594
Oh, you GOTTA post some pictures of THAT project, for sure! Must be some SERIOUS iron there!
Jon
Reply to
Jon Elson

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