The BIG one - caption competition still open

The caption 'competition' is still open. This is the original posting
>I promised you all a BIG one.
At last I've managed to sum up the courage to publish this photo. Some
say you will need a sick bag to view this one - and they are just the kind ones! Here it is http://mikehughes627.fotopic.net/p52922253.html
Having asked you to send in your various captions after I've posted photos of our members (and visitors) I must now stand in the firing line myself. So this is the next 'caption competition'.
I know I probably don't have to tell you that you can be a rude as you like. I'll publish the ones that are suitable for general consumption with the final one being posted to the site. This time the decision is *mine* <
Here are some of the replies I've received. Can you do better?
"well its the best pic we could get, what with all the light shining off his head!"
"this keyboard is too small for my podgy fingers"
Geeze, you are about my size... Skinny!!!!! Just about as handsome too.
"Tell me again. How many times do I press this key to get to the naked ladies?"
Spotted Mick gets his just desserts!
'After only ever living life as a 'Trekkie', Mike sat for hours trying to figure why he couldn't 'beam' the flat car down!'
'Oh! A train simulator, now how do I find a loco?'
'Now I now what they mean about exciting pictures on the internet!'
'So many buttons! I'm only used to two knobs on my Etch-a-Sketch!'
'Mike spent hours trying to change the picture - not realising that someone had stuck a photo of this screen-shot on to his screen!'
How do I turn this bloody thing off?
Wow, look at this weird train.
"After a mix up with sugar while making the tea, Mike is only allowed remote access to the layout from a safe distance for his own protection."
Dad gum, man. You make me look like Adonis. TAXI !
--
Mike Hughes
A Taxi driver licensed for London and Brighton
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On Mon, 25 Aug 2008 10:38:41 +0100, Mike Hughes

My entry: "Spamming fuckwit gets LARTed"
Guy
--
May contain traces of irony. Contents liable to settle after posting.
http://www.chapmancentral.co.uk
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"Just zis Guy, you know?" wrote

LOL.
John.
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Staff of the Natural History Museum investigate claims that "the missing link" has been found alive in uk.transport. A spokesman said "There may even be a number of adults and juveniles in some kind of social or family group. The really exciting news is that they posses what we would recognise as rudimentary language skills. It seems they must have had contact with higher humans sometime during the Anglo- Saxon period but then withdrew into the denser forested areas. They obviously do not have the brain capacity to develop the language further. It seems that the ongoing march of development, possibly linked with global warming, has brought them out into the open again".
Andrew
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In message
snipped-for-privacy@sheerstock.fsnet.co.uk writes

ROTFL
I *really* like that one. <serious mode on> Far better than the usual inane, dumb answers we see posted by some on here :-) <serious mode off>
It's a shame that it's probably too big to go in as a caption on my fotopic site :-)))
--
Mike Hughes
A Taxi driver licensed for London and Brighton
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Mike Hughes wrote:

[...]
After several days of experimentation, he realised that a photograph of a bulldozer set into a wagon would not, after all, create the desired illusion.
--
wolf k.

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