Hope Springs Eternal.

See? I knew you were civilized. We agree completely on this matter.

-- Ray

I would be HAPPY to tell you face to face. Just tell which NMRA convention you will attend and we can make it a festive occasion, Mr. Dipshit.

Banjo ? the only instrument considered more of a bastard instrument than the C Melody Sax.

Go back to Dueling Banjos and leave the REAL musicians alone.

Let's take a poll in public. I'll meet you anywhere, anyplace ( in the mainland 48 states ) at a NMRA convention and debate you on music ANYDAY.

Gee, I've judged horor band auditions for over 30 years, guess that makes me a judge ( since I was paid for it )

My bands have performed in the Macy's parade..............so I guess I'm now a TV star ?

My my my, you still want to play this game ?

I may be an arrogant ass ( true to my nature ) but you sir, are nothing but a BS artist, and a poor one at that. I'm 53 years old and crippled from GBS and yet you question me about calling you out behind a keyboard ? Put up or shut up Mister Expert.

Look up the word gonads and get back to me.

I'll be more than happy to say it to his face.

Oh, my goodness. It's a geriatric belly bucking contest. Glad I'm sitting this one out.

-- Ray

Ray, come on in, the waters FINE.

The difference between Mister Expert and me is the fact that I realise I'm an ass.

He feels he's somewhat important the big picture.

Maybe I'll just send one of my students to embarass him.....errr, I mean Mister Professional.

After years of feeling sorry about how people picked on him..........he managed to strike a nerve.

And by the way, I've had people pay me real money to build their layouts, I guess that makes me a "professional" model railroader.....................BAHAHAHAHA

Yea, right. shuuuuuure

I would be HAPPY to tell you face to face. Just tell which NMRA convention you will attend and we can make it a festive occasion, Mr. Dipshit.

Banjo ? the only instrument considered more of a bastard instrument than the C Melody Sax.

Go back to Dueling Banjos and leave the REAL musicians alone.

Let's take a poll in public. I'll meet you anywhere, anyplace ( in the mainland 48 states ) at a NMRA convention and debate you on music ANYDAY.

Gee, I've judged horor band auditions for over 30 years, guess that makes me a judge ( since I was paid for it )

My bands have performed in the Macy's parade..............so I guess I'm now a TV star ?

My my my, you still want to play this game ?

I may be an arrogant ass

------------------------------------------------------------------------

You've removed all about that - and more ...

Did you mean to say "you've removed all doubt about that-and more " ?

No, it means a lot.

But only if you have a sense of honor.

Next time I go to one I'll be sure and let you know.

BUAHHAHAHA! You think you can insult a type of *instrument* and hurt someone's feelings? Wow!

I'm a guitarist/luthier who also builds and plays mandlolins, mandolas, various banjos, autoharps, and most other things with frets. (If you're going to work on them and know what you're doing, you pretty much *have* to know how to play 'em at an expert level, and yes, that includes banjos.)

But unless you're Bella Fleck or Earl Scruggs it's pretty much impossible to earn a living with a banjo -much less a *good* living. So thanks for the complement but I don't think of myself a banjo player: just a musician.

Right. Along with the REAL model railroaders, the REAL conservatives, the REAL liberals, the REAL motorcyclists, and all the rest of the REAL online doofi who think they're qualified to judge who's REAL and who isn't. (Oddly enough, they always begin with the premise that they themselves are REAL and that the people they dislike are NOT; so their judgements can pretty much be discounted on grounds of self-interest, if not irrationality.)

"Poll"? "Debate"?

I'm a musician. I "play" music, not "debate" it, and I've never seen

Freudian slip. FUNNY Freudian slip.

Poor baby.

But let's just take a look at the evidence, shall we?

Go back and look at the threads I've started here in the past: painting semi-impressionist backdrops, restoring cheap brass locos, getting around eBay's Paypal requirements, yadda-yadda-yadda, and note that with the exception of one question about DCC they have *all* been attempts to share useful useful or entertaining information with others who may be interested.

In my judgement that's what Usenet's *for*. To help others if you can and to share ideas.

Now note something else about those threads: in just about every one there have been one or more doofi who've posted not to help or add useful input, but to rage about how wrong I am, to claim that *their* ideas are much better, and to do so just as impolitely as they can. (Why they failed to originate their own threads with their own ideas in the first place, and why they feel compelled to attack anyone else whose ideas differ from their own rather than just politely say "here's hows I do that" is an exercise best left to the imagination.)

But it seems this crowd exists mainly to criticise, and you - significantly- have been right up there among the loudest leaders of that band.

And in that spirit another poster here emailed me privately not long ago saying, "Jeeze! You spent your time writing something useful and those _______s do nothing but attack you for it!" And as I thought to myself as I read it; "Yup. Pegged it in one."

As I've said here before and I'll probably have to say again: If another poster treats me decently I'll return the favor. And if he flames me I'll probably return *that* favor too, so if you don't care for my posts there's probably a good reason for it, and you'll likely see it the next time you shave.

To sum it up for you, I just hate when people toot their own horn and yet don't understand what intonation means.

It doesn't take a "master" player on an instrument to repair it, you just need to know all the fingerings. ( I know, I repair most woodwinds and brass and yet I'm just a hack ) Knowing the mechanics of playing an instrument and being a musician are not the same.

I'm sure you can hold your own in some circles. It was the manner in which you "proclaimed" your artistry in several fields and yet showed such a poor example of humor as your proof that set me off. YOU were the one who proclaimed it, no one else.

If thats what you need in life to make you happy ? Then by all means, you are a "master".

May you now rest in peace at night. I'm very sorry for interupting your dream.

As far as humor? This post was your best joke yet. Please, keep them coming.

I believe it was you who stated that you have fronted several bands. Of course you know the difference between those bands and a moose ? On a moose, the horns are in front and the ass is in the back......................................

Next time I go to one I'll be sure and let you know.

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This shows as a reply to me. Not, I think, what you meant.

On 5/10/2009 3:25 AM snipped-for-privacy@aol.com spake thus:

======================================================== What's the difference between a banjo and a chain saw? The chain saw has greater dynamic range.

What's the difference between a banjo and a South American Macaw? One is loud, obnoxious, and noisy; and the other is a bird.

What's the difference between a banjo and a Harley Davidson? You can tune a Harley.

What's the difference between a banjo and an onion? No one cries when you cut up a banjo.

What's the difference between a banjo and a trampoline? You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

What is the definition of perfect pitch? Throwing a banjo into a dumpster without hitting the rim.

What's the difference between a banjo and an Uzi? An Uzi only repeats forty times.

What's the least-used sentence in the English language? "Isn't that the banjo player's Porsche?"

What do you say to a banjo player in a three-piece suit? "Will the defendant please rise?"

What did the banjo player get on his IQ (or SAT) test? Drool.

How can you tell if the stage is level? If the banjo player drools out of both sides of his mouth.

What's the difference between a skunk run over on the road and a banjo player run over on the road? You see skid marks in front of the skunk.

What's the difference between a run over skunk and a run-over banjo player? The skunk was on its way to a gig.

Why are banjos better than guitars? They burn longer (and make all kinds of cool popping noises as they burn).

Why do some people take an instant aversion to banjo players? It saves time in the long run.

What should you do if you run over a banjo? Back up.

When do banjo songs sound the best? When they're over.

I got a million of 'em ...

ROTFL!! Thanks!

If you think banjos get no respect, you ought to see what they say about violas . . .

On 5/11/2009 10:24 PM Steve Caple spake thus:

... not to mention accordions, sopranos, tubas, etc.

What's the difference between a viola and a violin? The viola burns longer.

What's the difference between a viola and a coffin? The coffin has the dead person on the inside.

What's the difference between a seamstress and a violist? The seamstress tucks up the frills.

Although, as a violinist I have to say the best viola joke is actually a violin joke:

Did you know that a violin and a viola are actually exactly the same size? It's just that violinists' heads are so much larger.

You ought to see what they say about band directors and conductors, oboes and lead trumpets.

You ought to see what they say about band directors and conductors, oboes and lead trumpets.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Can either of you play "Lady of Spain" or "Melancholy Baby"?

Accordions don't play "Lady of Spain", people do!

On 5/12/2009 11:01 AM LD spake thus:

Funny thing about accordians; while the instrument has a uniformly cheesy reputation in the U.S. (or else is used snarkily by ironic punk musicians), it's quite a different story in other parts of the world (you mean there is actually culture *outside* of the United States???).

I used to be in a band that plays Eastern European and Balkan music (music of Hungary, Romania, Bulgaria, and countries of the former Yugoslavia). There, the accordian is an integral and essential part of the music (well, at least the folk and older popular music that *we* played; younger folks there listen to the same crap they do here). And not just as accompianment. It's one of the most expressive instruments there; hard to believe for something that simply makes a continuous sound, without vibrato or other effects possible. The players there ornament just about every note, with trills, turns, little blips and catches. A virtuoso Balkan accordianist is something to behold, especially the Bulgarians and even more especially the Serbs, who play button accordians rather than the piano-key type.